Hmmm. The posting about George's alt-mustache has me wondering whether he cheats and has a 'stache stunt double.
Like:

Everybody knows Dinah Shore's old boyfriend, right?...Right?

If you don't know him, you're likely a decent person. Or at least young.

It's just too bad that almost everyone knows the guy who belongs to this mustache.

George isn't even fluent in English; why would we think a Russian mustache would work out?

Okay, the testosterone anomaly is probably just too great for it to work.

Again, the hormonal difference. And I haven't seen The Intimidator's mustache doing any work recently.

Mark Spitz, the original Michael Phelps. From 1972, when water was denser and clocks ran faster.

Probably too much style; certainly too much 'stash wax.

At least the night/day thing is in sync.

Yeah, I know - the testosterone difference is so great rejection is almost guaranteed.
So maybe George's mustache does its own stunt work?