I wish I was packing a few years back. It was Halloween night, and I picked up my girlfriend so we could go ghost hunting in a little cemetery. This was up in Fairbanks, Alaska, by the way. We were going to try to get some EVPs lol. So we're sitting there in the parking lot talking about what we're going to do when we get in there. A car pulls up a few spots down and a guy gets out. He stands there looking into the cemetery. We glanced at him and went back to our discussion. I glanced up again and saw he was wanking off! Wanking off while looking into the cemetery!
He then sees us looking at him, and he starts to walk to my car while in mid-wank. Well, I'm a pretty cool customer, so as I'm looking at him, I casually reach down and grab my camera. When he's in range, I start to take full flash pics of him and his noodle. He was shocked as hell. He jumped into his truck and tried to take off, but I pulled in front of him to take a pic of his license plate.
He booked out of there, but I decided to follow him. Fairbanks is a very small town. I chased him around downtown, going the wrong way on a one-way on black ice. It was crazy, I'll admit it, but I was pissed. I thought what if this freak approached my daughter and her friends? With how casual he was about it, you know it was not the first time he'd done it. Anyway, I chased his ass to his house and then drove the 2 blocks to the police station.
We told the cops what happened, gave them the flash card to d/l the pics, and gave them his address. Within an hour, he was in a line up for us to identify. Last I heard, he pled down to some ridiculous charge. Turns out he was the son of "VIPs" in town.
Guess it's okay to wank off in public if your parents buy the town a ball field.